I don’t think I can articulate just how crazy nervous I am right now. My heart is thumping through my chest, my breath is short and dry, while my body is filling up with fear and I am not even sure why. Is it because I am posting my first blog and have absolutely no clue what I am doing. Is it because I feel like I am posing nude at Grand Central Station with not even a fig leaf as a friend. Or maybe it’s because no one will like me and I will have to spend my lunchtimes eating on my own? I feel like mum has just dropped me off at the playground gate and said “she’ll be right love, just smile, you’ll make friends in no time” Gee thanks Mum, but not even you can be my soft spot to land right now.
I believe I am where I am supposed to be in life and feel I have an extremely blessed life to date. So jumping off the edge of ‘my normal’ into the unknown really doesn’t sit well for me and what I am about. Until recently that is, when I had my first real “ahha moment”…..I’ve being busy existing – not busy living! I start projects, but never finish them, I research topics of interest and then lose interest, I advocate being there for your kids yet wish I was invisible from mine, I pride myself on how well I listen to others but never really hear a word I say. So once again I got busy thinking and wondered what I would do differently than before – then I found this in my wallet. A card I have carried with me from a time long ago when I needed some assistance with which direction I should take.
“If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it is yours. If not, it was never meant to be.”
So here I am – 20 years on and needing assistance once again. Well guess what, I am setting my passion free! My desire to learn about others, to assist friends, to listen when you think no one can hear and most importantly to keep telling myself to sit down, buckle up and hang on, because I am about to have the most authentic time of my life. So that’s what I am doing and that’s why I am here. It’s time for me to get busy living.
Okay, now that I feel 10pounds lighter and 6inches taller, I will start the conversation, but like any new relationship I am going to take it slow and steady – firstly because I generally don’t do anything unless I have an audience and secondly so we can learn about each other together.
So, where to from here…….Cheers, SorrentoMoon